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IPO - "butts lol fashions" 10 a.m. Mon. April 16
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Josh Millard RJ: Tex Corman CO: J. Quaff Arabica Post Rating: 5 + / - Total Posts: 167 Karma: 231 Joined: Apr 3, 2012 |
Posted on Apr 15, 2012 (Last edited on Apr 15, 2012) DONUT MAGNATE TEX CORMAN ANNOUNCES "BUTTS LOL FASHIONS" IPO"We make the donuts that make your mouth full," Giant Donut Inc. CEO and billionaire founder Tex Corman said today, speaking from the deck of his private yacht to press assembled on the deck of his other private yacht. "Now, we make the pants that make your butts lol." With a retail-centric revenue model and a growing bottom-to-top textile and manufacturing supply chain, butts lol fashions is a rapidly expanding presence in the Econosian apparel industry. Said Corman: "the market is like a pair of shoes, and they're awfully big, and we're gonna fill 'em. With cash from our upcoming IPO we intend to make sure that everyone's ass looks good -- in a pair of butts lol jeans." "We'll put your butts in the jeans of the market shoe, basically," Corman elaborated, before squinting at his notes and asking for "a scotch already, what's the hold up, and nothing Islay, if I wanted to drink something that smells like burning tires I'd do body shots off a dump security guard, chrissake." The IPO is scheduled for 10 AM server/Pacific time, Monday, April 16. |
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